When did things get so easy for some and come at the expense of others? 

When I was young I was taught, as was every other kid I knew, that there were things that had to be done; so we did them.  We were also told that there were things that could be done; so if we had time and the inclination we did those too.  After all the things that had to be done and all the things that could be done were done there then remained things that might be done.  These were the things that existed as goals, as dreams.

I was raised in a lower-middle class family in the middle of a middle-class neighborhood (they weren’t called communities so much then- well maybe the banks were) so dreams were not in abundance but they did exist.  You just had to go find them.  And once you found them you had to then go after them.

When I was young my mother died.  She died of after a five year battle with cancer.  The dreams I was pursuing in music (piano), sports (mostly baseball at that time), Scouts, art (I was trying at least) and many other areas were suddenly put on hold or died right along with her.  I don’t really blame this on anything, it just happened. Maybe I could have managed to overcome the challenges then placed before me so that I could continue to pursue my young and simple dreams but my dad worked a lot and things just sort of floated away from me.  I was just eleven and had to learn all about taking care of myself and doing what was necessary for the family. 

I learned to get myself ready for school; I learned to cook (a little at least); I learned how to iron clothes and do laundry; I learned how to do homework without much help at home; I learned how to come home to an empty house in a changing neighborhood and not be too scared.

I never really dreamed about becoming an engineer but I became one nonetheless.  Since I had managed to get good grades in high school I managed to get some scholarship money and that, coupled with working and some financial aid, allowed me to pursue a degree in electrical engineering.

From there I managed to survive some bad decisions and a less-than-exemplary lifestyle and gain control of myself and my financial well-being.  I finally purchased a house, got married, had kids, and have a wonderful family.  I’m not sure that I am ready for retirement having recently lost my job but I am much more ready than I would have been if I had not faced and overcome many challenges along the way.

My challenges were nothing in comparison to some folks of course.  My success is not all that unique or amazing.  But, in sum, the things that I have done have left me perhaps in the “top 10-15%” and I would be a 1%er if I could and I would try not to be labeled one of the 99%ers if I could in any way avoid being dolloped into that nomenclature. 

That is the way it should be.  Do what needs to be done and do what you can.  After all that then do what you might and be what you would dream to be.

And then, don’t blame yourself or your situation on someone or something else.  Throw off the shackles, get the sheet off your face, smell the damn coffee, see the light of day, stop your whining, quit expecting something for nothing, and get on with becoming somebody.  Take a dream and pursue it; set a goal and achieve it; face your challenges, face life, and overcome them. 

Respect yourself.  Respect yourself.

Oh yeah, my biggest dream outside of having a wonderful family?  To write and become a writer.  That’s something I never seriously pursued and therefore never had the chance to achieve but I pray that there is still enough time for me.  At least I have started and I can respect that.